For the sake of full disclosure, I should tell you that I am not married. I have never been married. Nor have I been engaged, although this one time, I did look up how easy it would be to get a marriage license in the state of New Hampshire, where I do not live. I have been a groomsman now at four weddings, have given toasts at three and am currently watching my younger sister prepare for her upcoming nuptials. In the total tonnage of weddings I have witnessed -- from best friends to cousins to acquaintances to total strangers -- I have come away knowing there is one rule, and one rule only, that men should follow. It’s a rule I discovered at my best friend Matt’s wedding. We were all 22 at the time, fresh out of college. After the ceremony, as we danced and drank and male ... Read More »
While no one is sure when the tradition of the wedding cake began, it is generally accepted that the ritual centered on granting the new couple prosperity and fertility. This was achieved, it seems, by crumbling the cake and throwing it over the newlyweds’ heads. As if this was not disturbing enough, wedding guests would then make a mad scramble to consume the crumbs from the floor, with the hope of garnering some of the residual “good luck.” Today’s wedding cake is, no doubt, much different from those cakes of old, with one unfortunate exception. While they are all beautiful to the eye, many are still worthy of that same ultimate demise of being crumbled and tossed! Fortunately, the number of pastry chefs who can create a wedding cake that is as good to taste as it is beautiful are growing in numbers. Growing even faster is the number of ... Read More »
These very wise words, “Anger is Not An Aphrodisiac” were uttered during a recent seminar on anger given by Raymond DiGuiseppe, Ph.D. It’s worth spending some time talking about anger because as much as you love your partner, you will not always like his/her behavior or opinions. How you express your feelings of anger can make or break your ability to problem-solve and get along in your relationship. Anger, like any other emotion, is there to give you information. Anger is elicited whenever you think or perceive that: 1) things are unfair; 2) you are being mistreated; or, 3) your “shoulds” or rules about the world are being violated (e.g., “You should notice the crumbs left on the counter and wipe up after yourself.”) You get angry when you think someone is doing the above on purpose. Anger is adaptive because it can motivate you to change what is unfair or ... Read More »
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