Friends & Family: What Not to Say to the Bride or Groom

Avoid these statements and questions in order to not bother the newlyweds.

Friends & Family: What Not to Say to the Bride or Groom

Photo: Maya Myers Photography

what you shouldn't say to the bride or groom
Ironically, wedding guests often don’t get much opportunity to speak with the couple of honor. That means every moment counts, and you’ll want to make a good impression. Unfortunately, whether due to nosiness or a misguided attempt to be clever, many people find themselves inadvertently offending newlyweds.

In order to prevent that from happening, below are six examples of things you should never say to a bride or groom on (or about) their wedding day:

“You should’ve spent the money on something else.”
For starters, you don’t really know how much money they spent, or how much money they may have in savings for other priorities such as travel or a house. Second of all, one of their parents may have offered to pay for the wedding, but the money was not transferrable to anything else the newlyweds may have preferred. Most importantly, however, is that it’s simply not any of your business. 

“When are you going to have a baby?”
Just like the previous statement, this really isn’t anyone else’s business to know. Not to mention: they just got married! Give them a bit to enjoy marriage before butting into their lives. On another note, with the difficulties that can come with trying to conceive and carry a baby to term, it’s best to let those who choose to have children announce the news in their own time. 

“I can’t find my seat.”
Or any other logistical question you might have. They are going to be very busy and you don’t want to bother that happy couple with things like this. Find a coordinator or someone from the event staff to help you. Failing that, it’s okay to reach out to a member of the bridal party as long as they aren’t about to give a toast or do another important task. 

“You know 50% of marriages end in divorce, right?”
Ignoring the out-of-context and outdated analysis involved in this much-cited stat, there is absolutely no reason to bring up divorce at someone’s wedding. Don’t do it. No exceptions. 

“Are you ready for the wedding night?”
Don’t be weird or creepy. If you have a playful enough relationship with one of the lovebirds, leave those kinds of jokes for the bachelor or bachelorette party.

“I can’t wait to steal this for my own wedding!”
Imitation may be the sincerest form of flattery, but no one wants to worry about their reception décor being copied while they’re still trying to enjoy the celebration. Everyone wants their big day to be unique, but if you really love an element of the event, wait a couple of months and ask for tips to create something similar, but not exactly the same. 

Opening photo by Maya Myers Photography; Planning & Design by Sterling Engagements