For those pairs who have recently agreed to marry: congratulations! This is an incredibly exciting time for both you and your beloved. Your days should be filled with sweet sentiments to one another, blissful calls to and from relatives, and incredibly idealistic, playful wedding planning (i.e., “Wouldn’t it be romantic to be married on a gondola?” “We’re an adventurous couple, why not say our vows while speeding through the jungle on a zip-line?”). This time period – however long or short it may be – is the lovely calm before the chaos that comes with organizing your nuptials. In this love-filled space, however, some couples make errors in judgment due to their elation and excitement. Though it’s great to celebrate and project your positive emotions, there are certain mistakes the engaged pairs should take care not to make:
- Oversharing on social media. No matter how loved-up you and your partner feel, there is a limit to how much you should denote your feelings online. Not only can this information flood the newsfeeds of your friends and family – sometimes to an annoying degree – it can also cause some serious logistical problems down the road. The more details you reveal about your wedding on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and so on, the more the information can fall into the “wrong hands.” There have been many modern cases of uninvited attendees showing up to vow exchanges, either because they assumed they were invited due to the openness of the couple or simply to “crash” the event. When engaged, documenting your planning process, such as discussing what venues you’re touring, the caterers you’re considering, and so forth, can leave you vulnerable to scams – or worse – in the world of the internet.
- Forgetting to privately notify “VIPs.” Before clicking the “post” button on that beautifully manicured photo of your engagement ring, ask yourself: “Have I called everyone in my inner circle?” For some couples, this could simply mean ringing both sets of parents, while for others there may be a long list of family and friends who deserve a quick and celebratory phone conversation before the news is broadcast. Not doing so may hurt some feelings and cause issues during this blissful time, which is a difficult way to begin the planning stage. Social media can make things a little tricky for contemporary brides and grooms, so it is always best to stop and think before sharing any of your personal information – wedding related or not.
- Choosing and asking the bridal party immediately. Many experts recommend holding off on asking friends and relatives to join the wedding party until around eight months before the big day. While you may be excited and confident in your choices – even if you’ve had your ‘maids picked out since age nine – there’s no harm in waiting. A few months can drastically change a relationship, and there have been many cases wherein a wedding has altered friendships before it has even occurred. We advise saving your “will you be my bridesmaid/groomsman” gifts until you’ve gotten further into your event coordination.
- Booking certain vendors before your venue. Many brides and grooms hold certain dates near and dear to their hearts – the anniversaries of first kisses, first dates, first vacations, and beyond – however, agreeing on a date between the two of you does not solidify it on the calendar. You do not have an official wedding date until you have booked a venue, which means that the paperwork is signed and processed. If you jump ahead of yourself and start speaking with caterers, DJs, and other vendors before you have an official wedding day, you can inadvertently cause quite a headache for yourself later. Once engaged, decide upon a budget, create a preliminary guest list, hire a planner if need be, and book a venue before securing other professionals.
Read up on other faux pas couples make when planning their nuptials, discover what to do if a guest breaks social media etiquette, and find out what to avoid doing when organizing a bachelorette party.
Opening photo by Justin DeMutiis Photography; Planning & Design by Très Chic Southern Weddings & Events